As we approach the last few days of November, two things are foremost in a lot of Canadian's minds. First is the complete lack of snow. This, it appears is quite unusual. By now, common belief holds that we should have had a decent fall by now and indeed, for the last few weeks most residents have been preparing earnestly. Yards have been cleared, snow boots dusted off, snow tyres fitted to the car and yet nothing, nada, zilch. We all feel a bit like the defenders of a castle, manning the ramparts, snow shovels at the ready and waiting for the enemy hordes to pour over the ridge and assault the battlements. But, still we wait.
The second event that is fast gaining momentum is, of course, Christmas. Yes, no sooner have the Halloween witches returned to their covens then thoughts turn to bright lights, tinsel and the enormous sums of money we will be pouring into the economy over the next month. Now normally, any allusion to Christmas before the 1st December brings me out in hives. In the UK, I could feel the tension building up with the first tv commercial for WH Smith and the first sign of Christmas goods appearing in the shops in early November. By the time Christmas Day actually arrived, I was so shell shocked and sick of the whole commercial shebang that the whole thing felt very anti-climactic. Here, though, I'm not getting that, at least in anything like the same degree. I think it is something to do with the lack of full in-your-face advertising by the big stores and the more relaxed approach to the forthcoming holiday that is typically Canadian. We also seem to be a bit more organised as well. Claire being at home full time certainly helps. She has more time to keep the house tidy and plan things. She stops short of making her own decorations out of pipe cleaners and crepe paper but you get my drift. We have even started shopping for the kids already. I have started to throw myself into preparations with newly acquired gusto. Where are we going to buy the tree? Actually having an idea of what to buy Claire, writing a list of 'stuff' that we need, that sort of thing. However, proving that I am turning Canadian by degrees and truly getting into the spirit of things, this weekend saw me purchasing two staple items of anybody's Christmas - lights and logs.
One thing that Canadians love to do, is decorate the outside of their homes with lights. Coloured lights, tree lights, lights in the shape of reindeer, small trees, large trees, you name it. This year our house will be no different. So in Canadian Tire on Saturday I bought ten boxes of cool white icicle lights. Thats 700 lights in over 70 feet boys. Now, if I had gone shopping for ten boxes of lights in the UK, there is no doubt that a few eyebrows would be raised and people would have given me the odd look normally reserved for the psychologically disturbed. Here of course, if you buy anything less than ten boxes, you would be politely informed that you are letting the nation down and taken away for re-education. I have bought many clips to mount the lights as well and next weekend, the eaves of our house will be lit up like, well, er like a Christmas tree....I also have my eyes on some additional lighting for the shrubs on the lawn and well, I'm sure I can find some room for a full scale model of Santa and his sleigh somewhere....
The other thing I went for were logs for the fire, as we have a wood burning fireplace in the family room and an outdoor fire-pit. I also purchased that essential piece of an outdoorsman's tool kit - a bloody great axe. The next thing to do was to buy the logs. This entailed hours of internet research. You just can't walk into a supplier and say 'I want some logs for the fire please', oh no. What sort of wood is best for your situation? Do you want it seasoned for a year or two? How quickly does it burn and therefore how much do you need? What the hell is a cord of wood anyway? These and other, er burning questions needed to be answered. First is finding a reputable supplier. After all you don't want to order best quality birch and end up with half damp pine. Secondly, how much do you need? Well, wood is sold in cords. One cord is a stack of wood measuring 8 feet long by 4 feet wide and 4 feet high. That, my friends, is a lot of wood. After some thought and a lot of guesswork, we went for half a cord of birch. It should be delivered today or tomorrow. Then, all it will need is for me to get to work with my new chopper and we are good to go. Now, we are not imagining axe wielding a la Charles Bronson in 'The Magnificent Seven' here, stripped to the waist and glistening in the sun. As much as semi-naked wood chopping may appeal to me, the whole idea of taking one's shirt off is likely to lead to the loss of my nipples to the freezing cold and probably the loss of my foot to an errant blow. No, slow and sure will be the order of the day, fully clothed and out of the sight of my neighbours. Laughter at my technique has often been a motif in my life....
Monday, 24 November 2008
Wednesday, 5 November 2008
Treats and tickertape
For those of you who have been reading this blog since it was first started, you will know that last Friday was one of Canada's favourite nights - Halloween. Last year, we sort of stumbled through it in a post emigratory haze and this year I was determined to get into the full swing of things. I had plans to carve pumpkins, decorate the outside of the house with ghoulish paraphernalia and get myself costumed up. In the event, we managed a hand made black cat stuck on the front door. As usual, our best intentions came to nothing but we did, however have a good Halloween. We were invited to a friends house for a bit of a do and so that we could group our respective children together to go trick or treating. We bought Charlotte a proper costume (she went as a snow princess) and managed to borrow one for Eleanor in the form of a giraffe - don't ask. To be honest, I'm not a big dressing up kind of guy and I prefer to leave that sort of thing for the kids, but after this year's experience, I might have a re-think next year. You see this year, it was the mens' turn to accompany the children on their annual rampage through the streets, happily relieving every possible household of their supply of candy and it was, I have to say, darn good fun. They each had purpose made candy bags to collect their spoils and one enduring image of the event will be of my 2 year old running maniacally from house to house, dressed as a furry animal and happily joining in with the 'trick or treat' refrain before opening up her bag. The sight of her dragging an increasingly bulging bag across people's front yards was very funny indeed. If the sight of groups of children dressed in costumes ranging from the Incredible Hulk to well.. a giraffe wasn't funny enough, the behaviour and good natured involvement of the average Canadian householder was also worthy of note. Most houses are decked out to some degree, but others are just incredible. For one evening a year some people just go crazy.
The imagination of many house owners is to be applauded as you come across gardens converted into graveyards, zombies and mummys rub shoulders with coffins, witches and giant spiders and an increasingly number of gardens sport theatrical lights, dry ice and chilling sound effects that just add that extra little edge of terror for your average 6 year old. One house had covered their entire frontage with a black sheet onto which they had attached any number of grisly items, the family were outside in full costume surrounded by animatronic ghosts, headless corpses and suchlike. It was a little surreal to see Death having a quick cup of coffee whilst chatting to a fully bandaged and rather animated mummy. Needless to say, when the kids turned up, they were given the full Halloween welcome and left with an absurd amount of candy to add to their stash. If you ever get the chance to pass a few words with a headless corpse, I would recommend it - very entertaining. As good as that was, my personal favourite was coming across a house which had the traditional flickering pumpkins outside and a modicum of other attractions, but when the children rang the doorbell, a perfectly dressed, white faced and completely authentic Count Dracula came to the door. He wished them all a chilling 'good evening children' doled out some candy, waved and then retired back into his house no doubt to have a quick lie down in his living room coffin (or should that be living dead room?). He played it completely straight faced and it was all the more wonderful for that. I love Halloween, next year I'm really going to make an effort. Mind you, we will still be getting through the enormous pile of candy that the children blagged - that is if our teeth haven't fallen out first.
From one bizarre event to another, yesterday saw the first black American voted into the most influential post in the world as Barack Obama creamed John McCain for the US Presidency. Most Canadians gave the whole shebang a complete ignoring to, but Claire and I were glued to the most excellent BBC World coverage for the whole evening. The Americans, it must be said are a very bizarre nation. Whereas it took Canada three weeks to re-elect Stephen Harper as their Prime Minister of a country that is second largest in the world and it takes us Brits between three and six weeks to elect 630 or so MP's in a country with a population of 20 times that of Canada, it takes 20 months and over a billion dollars for the Americans to chose one of two people to lead their country. The candidates fly all over the States, they have thousands of volunteers, hundreds of campaign offices and an army of aides and helpers to tell the public what they could probably find out by reading a newspaper. As much as I enjoy the razzamatazz of the American election and am darn pleased that Obama has won in a historic moment for Western democracy, I can't help but feel somewhat uneasy at the obscene amounts of money that have been spent to get him there. If his message is that good (and I think it is) and the American people are that interested (and I think they are) in a change from the ridiculous Bush administration, why does it take the gross national product of a small African nation to get there? In these days of high speed communication, instant news and prolific media coverage, do the candidates really have to meet every single voter in America to get the point across?
The answer of course, is yes because the average American voter can't just get by on televised speeches, reports on the mandates and analysis of the policies. It is not their way. They must see their politicians up close and personal, they have to experience the messianic like rhetoric of their champion and they have to have an army of people to bang the message in. No wonder John McCain looked like he was on the point of collapse and Obama exhausted to the point where even he couldn't smile any more, even at his victory speech. I enjoyed the election and look forward to Obama's presidency. If I may, I would like to make an observation, America, if you would permit. If you want to help solve the financial crisis, wouldn't it help if you stopped fighting unwinnable wars and cap the time and money you spend on electing your leader? Don't you think that would help - just a bit?
Highlights of last night: Obama winning, McCain's heartfelt and noble concession speech, the BBC coverage, putting the ghost of Florida 2000 to rest and the thumping great Democrat majority.
Low points: A grumpy Republican dissing the BBC because the reporter dared to challenge a party member's answer to his question and the sight of people crying and wailing at the political gatherings. Get a grip.
The imagination of many house owners is to be applauded as you come across gardens converted into graveyards, zombies and mummys rub shoulders with coffins, witches and giant spiders and an increasingly number of gardens sport theatrical lights, dry ice and chilling sound effects that just add that extra little edge of terror for your average 6 year old. One house had covered their entire frontage with a black sheet onto which they had attached any number of grisly items, the family were outside in full costume surrounded by animatronic ghosts, headless corpses and suchlike. It was a little surreal to see Death having a quick cup of coffee whilst chatting to a fully bandaged and rather animated mummy. Needless to say, when the kids turned up, they were given the full Halloween welcome and left with an absurd amount of candy to add to their stash. If you ever get the chance to pass a few words with a headless corpse, I would recommend it - very entertaining. As good as that was, my personal favourite was coming across a house which had the traditional flickering pumpkins outside and a modicum of other attractions, but when the children rang the doorbell, a perfectly dressed, white faced and completely authentic Count Dracula came to the door. He wished them all a chilling 'good evening children' doled out some candy, waved and then retired back into his house no doubt to have a quick lie down in his living room coffin (or should that be living dead room?). He played it completely straight faced and it was all the more wonderful for that. I love Halloween, next year I'm really going to make an effort. Mind you, we will still be getting through the enormous pile of candy that the children blagged - that is if our teeth haven't fallen out first.
From one bizarre event to another, yesterday saw the first black American voted into the most influential post in the world as Barack Obama creamed John McCain for the US Presidency. Most Canadians gave the whole shebang a complete ignoring to, but Claire and I were glued to the most excellent BBC World coverage for the whole evening. The Americans, it must be said are a very bizarre nation. Whereas it took Canada three weeks to re-elect Stephen Harper as their Prime Minister of a country that is second largest in the world and it takes us Brits between three and six weeks to elect 630 or so MP's in a country with a population of 20 times that of Canada, it takes 20 months and over a billion dollars for the Americans to chose one of two people to lead their country. The candidates fly all over the States, they have thousands of volunteers, hundreds of campaign offices and an army of aides and helpers to tell the public what they could probably find out by reading a newspaper. As much as I enjoy the razzamatazz of the American election and am darn pleased that Obama has won in a historic moment for Western democracy, I can't help but feel somewhat uneasy at the obscene amounts of money that have been spent to get him there. If his message is that good (and I think it is) and the American people are that interested (and I think they are) in a change from the ridiculous Bush administration, why does it take the gross national product of a small African nation to get there? In these days of high speed communication, instant news and prolific media coverage, do the candidates really have to meet every single voter in America to get the point across?
The answer of course, is yes because the average American voter can't just get by on televised speeches, reports on the mandates and analysis of the policies. It is not their way. They must see their politicians up close and personal, they have to experience the messianic like rhetoric of their champion and they have to have an army of people to bang the message in. No wonder John McCain looked like he was on the point of collapse and Obama exhausted to the point where even he couldn't smile any more, even at his victory speech. I enjoyed the election and look forward to Obama's presidency. If I may, I would like to make an observation, America, if you would permit. If you want to help solve the financial crisis, wouldn't it help if you stopped fighting unwinnable wars and cap the time and money you spend on electing your leader? Don't you think that would help - just a bit?
Highlights of last night: Obama winning, McCain's heartfelt and noble concession speech, the BBC coverage, putting the ghost of Florida 2000 to rest and the thumping great Democrat majority.
Low points: A grumpy Republican dissing the BBC because the reporter dared to challenge a party member's answer to his question and the sight of people crying and wailing at the political gatherings. Get a grip.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
